Published in 2025
305 pages
9 hours and 2 minutes
Victoria Smith is the author of Hags: the demonisation of middle-aged women. Her journalism appears in The Critic, the New Statesman and various other publications. She writes on on feminism, motherhood and mental health.
What is this book about?
This book is not a criticism of kindness, empathy, compassion etc. as ‘woke’ concepts, but a critique of how a particular interpretation of kindness functions to condition, exploit, shame and/or silence women and girls.
‘Victoria Smith is a brilliant writer who every feminist should read’ Sharron Davies
‘This brilliant book shows how demands for compassion and generosity can be a mask for sexist ideology’ Susanna Rustin
A brilliantly witty and insightful analysis of how kindness culture is used against women.
Using the #JustBeKind trend of the 2020s as a starting point, (Un)kind explores how traditional beliefs about women’s ‘kind’ nature have been repackaged for an age that remains dependent – socially, politically, economically – on female self-sacrifice while finding the concept outdated and essentialist.
Looking at the various guises under which kindness culture is sold to women and girls – from play to self-help, social justice activism to empowerment – Victoria Smith argues that the pressure on women and girls has not decreased, but instead been incorporated into the ‘work’ of feminism. (Un)kind analyses the way in which this phenomenon ultimately distorts relationships, harming not just those coerced into performing ‘kindness work’ but the supposed recipients of their services.
Kindness culture supports the backlash against feminism while claiming to represent feminism’s – and women’s – true nature. It is, at heart, unkind.
‘Erudite, blisteringly smart and profoundly compassionate… A must-read for anyone hungry to understand the origins and dangers of contemporary exhortations to women to #BeKind, and for everyone who wants to live a feminist life’ Dr Rachel Hewitt
